Guys, this past week has been a rough one.
A series of crazy scary life circumstances suddenly sprang up at me and Jacob out of nowhere and left me constantly tense, anxious, and on edge all week long. I'm still adjusting.
Sleep has been eluding me. I've been averaging 4 hours or so a night for the last week and a half. That doesn't generally help with life coping.
The whole World Vision fiasco happened, which I found so distressing that I had to run away from social media for a day because every time I read something about it it just made me sadder and sadder.
And depression is definitely back for a visit. And it is hitting HARD.
When depression happens to coincide with actually difficult circumstances, it can be just really, really hard to keep convincing yourself that everything will be OK. Other people offer you solutions and prayer, and it's easy to get cynical about it and think, "Sure, maybe things will work out for them, but everything will be bad for me forever."
I just have to keep telling myself it won't be bad forever.
Because it won't.
Pffft, it's not even that bad right now. I can deal with any one of these things that attacked me this week. It's just when they're all together that it gets overwhelming, and the depression grabs a hold of that and says, "You know how crappy you feel this week? That's how you'll feel for the rest of your life!"
But it's not true.
This week, everything that happens may be making me very sad, but at some point, someday, something is going to happen that makes me very happy. And someday, the things that are making me sad at this moment are going to seem very far away.
Maybe even by the time this blog posts.
If not, maybe by the end of the week.
If not, maybe by the middle of the month.
But it will happen, and I'll be OK.
(...Although if blog posts are a little scarce until things are OK, that's why.)